Tuesday 7 June 2011

Stranger things have happened...

You could believe that the worse thing you could do is listen to the word of someone else, a stranger for that matter. They are not clairvoyant I hear you say. You could also believe that the worse thing you could do was take it for granted that you are not yet beyond your sell buy date, that your time hasn’t passed. I know where you are going with this, I hear you say, but I’m not convinced. Sorry, I’ve been there and done that.
Humor me this one time. Say you listen to this stranger and it works out as he says, I’m not saying it will but just say it does. You would be one step richer, one step closer to fulfilling your happiness. Or say you change your mind and accept that you may not have seen it all. That the trials, tribulations and the heartache are still just worthwhile for one more time to see things to the end. You just never know it may be your time, your place and your day.
There I say though, be wise but not in your conceit for that which has been is now and that which is yet to come has already been. If there is vanity in everything that we do then you just never know…

Saturday 4 June 2011

Get in line sinner I was here first!

He took the dictionary and smashed it hard on the table shattering the glass beneath and scattering the beads that lay in the saucepan. He turned, reaching and then looking for it. He was moving, snatching the phone and throwing it violently against the wall listening to the sound of breaking metal as the fury burned within his soul.
‘I am flawed,’ he whimpered, breathlessly. ‘I am indeed truly flawed.’
And then he was on the ground grabbing his head in his hands and locking himself away from life as he had come to know it. The bars in his despair where closer than he could have ever imagined. The nights were longer, the waiting nauseating.
‘I can do this I know I can. Yet I fail to see the purpose as I am already there. This voice makes no sense, it comes with a penance that leaves me distraught. How do I do it, where do I start?’
Endless questions, time afforded, reasons. Yes! Reasons! They where there when one needed them but still they were difficult to accept. A man can do good when it serves its purpose. A man would sacrifice when he sees the benefit of it. Still what lies in a man’s heart is what he will do when he faces the truth. This is the tell of his darkest hour. On this day he will make a prayer. It can go many ways but here is one way.
‘Dear Father, what does this sinner tell thee that you do not already know. I have failed to comprehend the wisdom that you have shown me through the years. I have failed to hear thy voice when confronted with the truth. I am my penance when my lust overcomes me. I fear my wrath because it controls me. I fear my folly because it is my disguise. Guide this servant to hope and thy faith. Guide this servant to the riches of thy bosom. When a man faces the storm he should be able to cry out. Call to his maker and father and say forsake me not for my burden overwhelms me. I am thy son and need this break father. Grant me this wish and make my joy holy. I cannot tell what lies in my heart because this sin that I commit is new to me too. One thing I can promise is to uphold my end as your grace desires. I am the fool with needless words in this prayer. I am the beggar that steals from your table. I am shameless in my search for victory. I wish for those things that I know only you can provide. I am lost father and seek you more than ever. I am lost father as I seek a path of escape. Make my burden lighter and remove sin from my shores. Make my burden lighter and take away resentment from my bones. I need your help father and your aid in my plans. I am dead to this world and hopeless in promises. I lie, cheat and steal with false promises. Help me dear God for I have fallen from thy grace. This is the prayer of the fool that kneels before thee. Help this great sinner to find peace and good shelter. I ask this through your son our Lord and savior. I beg this through our lord Jesus Christ, Amen.’